Friday, September 21, 2007


Last evening I heard...

“Affirmation” by Savage Garden

I believe the sun should never set upon an argument
I believe we place our happiness in other people's hands
I believe that junk food tastes so good because it's bad for you
I believe your parents did the best job they knew how to do
I believe that beauty magazines promote low self esteem
I believe I'm loved when I'm completely by myself alone

I believe in Karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can't appreciate real love 'til you've been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye

I believe you can't control or choose your sexuality
I believe that trust is more important than monogamy
I believe your most attractive features are your heart and soul
I believe that family is worth more than money or gold
I believe the struggle for financial freedom is unfair
I believe the only ones who disagree are millionaires

I believe in Karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can't appreciate real love 'til you've been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye

I believe forgiveness is the key to your own happiness
I believe that wedded bliss negates the need to be undressed
I believe that God does not endorse tv evangelists
I believe in love surviving death into eternity

I believe in Karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can't appreciate real love 'til you've been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye

...and I simply love it.

Tuesday, September 4, 2007


Today when i opened my eyes, ma was working in kitchen...i checkd time in my cell n it was is at home today....she missed her school today or what...
I went to her n the answer was today is JANMASHTAMI. So its our off....
":( but ma i have to go to office today...main nahi...," this is my usual reply whenever its mum's off...
Anyways the blog is not about me cribbing all the time but its about my memories when i was a kid. The word JANMASHTAMI was enough to ring bells in my memories popped up from somewhere...n i was just wondering that when i was a kid it used to be a great fun.
I used to wait for this season to come...festivals and festivals....celebrations and full masti...!

There is a baramda in our old house, which was an important part of my daily evening i used to play times sit with 'amma' and 'bauji' and used to have fun...! during this day, janmashtami....we used to decorate the front area of our lawn....what we call as 'jhanki' used to be so much times my cousins used to come over for festivals...
it seems that this lawn was our ground for maximum it diwali or holi....our adda used to be dis only....lawn and the slope that touches the road.....!
even the chirstmas celebration we had ( i only remember one) was here in this lawn....n the stairs....
Stairs was the place where i used to sit a lot...and the iron used to act like our swing...for which at times i got scolded too...!
Life was so much fun ...dat baramda...where i spent my childhood is very much there...but now its the time that my nephew enjoys in that baramda...!
It ws just a word that i recalled my childhood days...not more but i think a few years...i still remember at the age of nine when i shifted from this place...i used to miss all this a lot....
and even today when i step in that baramda....its feels as if am back to my place....

Sunday, September 2, 2007

a blessing

A daily affair,
my metro ride,
weird heartless people.
but still a few seems to be nice.

sometimes it seems to be a horrible journey,
but the kids who stand and run around,
are worth looking at
and enjoying this short journey.

A few days ago...I was angry when i stepped out of office. It was difficult for me to understand that someone can be so damn can people behave so rudely to prove that they are superior...i mean it was not only office but things which were accumulated within my heart....I was stressed and frustrated at that very moment!
And in that crowded metro it was a small kid who gifted my smile back to me. I don't know who was he...n neither did i spoke to him...but it was just his kiddish act dat made me realise that I should not be upset...the world is not only full of jerks but at the same time its also some cute, innocent kids who survive in this everything around urself
...don't have to be a part of jerks world...come join us and live ur life with full freedom...
Kids are sweet...they are innocent... they dn't discriminate amongst ppl standing besides them...

dat small 2-3 year old kid, who was trying really hard to be a member of the game of the two playing foot-ball was was his strong will that after chasing the two(who must be almost double or triple his age) for more den 20 mins, he managed to snatch that ball....
VICTORY...yeppiii....I won....
this was his expression and even i saw myself smiling....i was happy for him....n even i clapped...Wow...he won...I felt he was smiling at me and telling me, listen "It might take some time...but am sure things will fall in place...just give ur 100 % n you will get what you chase"

these small innocent acts are so pure....i personally feel its a blessing....that constantly reminds me that i don't have to be negative ever...thing will fall in place....n this kid strengthened my belief... "everything is always OK at d end n if its not OK, its not d end!"

Saturday, September 1, 2007


Its been long since i wrote anything on my blog...and the fact is that here i don't have any deadlines...i am free to write when i wish free to write what i want to...n this blog is totally about me being me, n nobody else!
At times i wonder, whatever happens happens for the best but then why do we sit, crib and cry about the things that happened! I know what happened in my life was one of my dreams...She got through her entrance, n d place we always wished too. I was happy dat her efforts were paid off n everyone's dream was being achieved...
but the feeling that she has moved to manipal is still not sinking...i felt i was strong enough to take it but a day before she was leaving, i broke...i never wanted her to go...i wish i could have told her this...i wish i could have stoppd her from going to that place but i never wanted to stop her from achieving OUR dream.
Life is weird. i think life is like this only...shall i call it double standards...don't know...whatever it is....the fact is that i miss her...!
Its been almost a few days she left delhi, n since then we spoke just twice or thrice...everytime we wish to talk .... we are not able to...timings r different...our lifestyle is completely different of what it used to be...i miss you my dear friend...i really miss you!
From a past few days, i was missing her n another friend of mine badly...i just wanted to sit besides them...for a silent conversation...i just wished to have their shoulder, on which i can keep my head n cry...cry like a kid coz lot have accumulated in my my soul...but the fact remains that i can't...
yesterday, while watching somethng on television i got emotional...i wanted to cry but was not able to ....i don't know...after a few mins my throat was paining badly...i was not able to speak...
i was wondering whether i got emotional about what i saw or it was medium for me to vent out wat was going in my heart....
one thing i know is that all this pain, all this loneliness was worth-it coz its d time when ill be able to meet n sit with one of these front of whom i don't have to pretend...nidhi is what she is...and this friend of mine knows the kid inside me...
wish for the time when ill sit next to both of them...d way we sat once for a little while...n the most amazing of that moment will be when i will laugh my heart out, while telling them my stupid acts n what happened...

Thursday, August 16, 2007

Feelings naah!...commercialised celebration

I think by the end of the day everyone must be really fed-up by the media coverage of our 60thIndependence Day. I know my blog entry is going to be about something same but still I noticed something that was actually weird.

First thing in the morning on this special day was the flat hosting ceremony by our respected Prime Minister at the ‘Red Fort’. I clearly remember it was exactly 0730 hours and it was the time. Our tri-colour, out flag was up there, looking beautiful as usual, and flying with the wind…and with this came our National Anthem. “A proud moment!”

Flashback for me coz National Anthem reminds me of my school days coz everyday before dispersing for our classes after daily prayers, we used to sing our National Anthem.

But today, while watching television I saw something weird. I don’t remember which channel it was but a ‘Jana Gana Mana' by various known singers and music composers was played on almost all channels. It was good to learn that all these singers came together to lend their voice to our National Anthem but I was offended by the video. I saw singers singing in the video, their hands going with music n there head just moving here and there. It was more of a show-off then our National Anthem. The different ragas these singers added to our simple National Anthem. And yeah, I am not so sure but I think it was sponsored by Airtel (coz every time it was played, it had Airtel written in the end). It was not just once but while surfing channels for just 30 mins, it was for the fifth time I noticed the same thing. If this was the case by various channels, then news channels were not less. The coverage of morning’s flag hosting was shown and once again, I saw the clipping of our National Anthem again being played. I don’t know but I was offended.

It is our National Anthem, and we all should respect it rather then degrading it as a song which can be played anytime, anywhere, when no one is concerned. For me respecting a National Anthem, be if of any country in this world matters a lot and here in our country, nobody is even concerned that our National Anthem has been taken for granted and made fun off.
I am not aware of laws for our National Anthem, if there are any but I wonder how come Airtel got this permission to show the latest recorded version of our National Anthem on television like this. Disgusting!

My last visit to Barista coffee shop, made me realise that it is just about feelings and being natural. I saw two foreigners sitting right next to me. Both of them had a small tri-colour pinned nicely on their shirts. I don’t know but at that moment I felt that it doesn’t matter where you were born or were brought up. It is just about respecting a nation. Contradictory to what I saw was a recent discussion with a friend. The discussion brought to my notice that a simple purchase of 5KG sugar can fetch you a tri-colour (made of paper) absolutely free! Isn’t it amazing?

Not only this - Tri-colour is being sold at various places but with the company/brand name printed over the bottom level of our flag. Hmmm...nice promotional scheme...can be a sure shot hit. Heck! Is anybody concerned what is happening. Our flag, does it matter that how rapidly, year after year we are strengthening our base by degrading our own national Anthem, flag or our feelings for our country. Or say degrading and dis-respecting our country, India.

I know the post sounds like a lecture –60th year of Independence but give a damn. Its just about being connected with something you strongly feel about.

Monday, August 13, 2007

Journey begins...

They say "DEATH does not concern us, bother us because till the time we are alive, death is not here and when death finally arrives, life is no where.

This is true but another truth is that, it is true only for the person who dies but not for the ones who are left behind...
For them it is the beginning of a new journey...really a long one!

Saturday, August 11, 2007

Patriotism or Hyprocrisy

Free India...Independence from years long British Rule....'15th August, 1947'
These are the golden words in Indian history.
I was not even born when India gained independence from century long british raaj. Neither I knew anything about the rule and freedom struggle before i read my history books. But one thing i remember was the incidents that my grandparents used to tell me...
Today we all get excited on this very day. Every year we celebrate this day....for some its about celebrating the day when we attained freedom, but for many its just about a holiday. It seems the day is no longer celebrated with the feeling of patriotism. It no longer stands for India but it stands for freedom...freedom from office work, freedom from school...!Many of us claims to be patriotic but some very small daily incidents reveals our reality...that reality which exists within us...which we have been either ignoring till now or are unaware of.
After every few years, we have some nice patriotic movies running successfully in cinema halls. Be it about British rule, the most admired game of our country Cricket, or just about our country, India. We all proudly walk to the halls, watch movies, enjoy, clap, feel proud and return back discussing 'how amazing the movie was'.
It is the year 2007 and we are going to celebrate our 60th Independence Day. Just five days before our 60th Independence Day 'Chak De India' has been released. This movie talks about many subjects which have been and are still bothering OUR COUNTRY, India. Our national game HOCKEY that nobody is interested in watching, demoralising WOMEN because they are assumed to work in the kitchen, war and lack of trust amongst the people of two different RELIGIONS, EGO clashes, self governed interest of every individual...and above all a ray of OPTIMISM.
Everyone sitting in the hall was happy and clapping whenever India scored a goal or when India won a match. Everyone feels proud of being an Indian, only if we win something or any Indian is a part of something extraordinary. But when it comes to our basics, our "National Anthem", people find it difficult to respect. It was weird! Music of the first few lines of our "National Anthem" was played in the movie but to my utter was just five out of hundreds who stood up to respect the nation. Its not about categorising people by saying this but it is about those, who were not able to stand but had enough strength to clap and whistle for every goal.
Gets difficult for me to understand. We assume to respect "National Anthem" of our country but why we often forget that the "National Anthem" of other countries are also important. I feel the patriotic feel has died within many souls and it seems to be a burden carried by many more. Isn't it a typical HYPOCRISY, a false appearance we always carry.